October 06, 2022

It is so easy to cast judgement.

Judgement is dangerous for one obvious reason and one rather insidious reason.

Judgement means you’re looking at other people and doing a comparison. We can’t even help the comparison part. Humans are hierarchical creatures. When we cast judgement, we’re trying to measure up. Do they have more than me? Can I run faster than her? Do I look better than him? Haha look at that stupid thing they just did! Judging means caring about the Joneses and whether you can keep up. It means thinking about being better relative to others instead of being better absolutely. It’s zero sum.

But that’s not the scary part. The scary part is how judgement changes the way you think. If you are constantly judging others, it means you are constantly worrying about being judged too. You know that everyone is judging everyone else because you assume that what you’re doing is normal behavior. Your brain builds a prison for itself with walls and bars built from your fears of what other people might think. And you stop yourself from doing things you want to do or trying things you might not be able to do . You keep your entire being walking properly on Normal Street in a magical realm of acceptable behavior called Average-world. You stay there and stand just the right way, so that you fit in. In the world of human capability, there is no sadder constraint than the ones we put on ourselves.

I’ve said before that not giving a shit what other people think is a superpower. It frees you up to figure out and decide what you want to do and how you want to do it.

Now I’ve realized that there’s a defined path for how to acquire this superpower. If you want to learn how not to give a shit what other people think, then don’t give a shit what other people DO. Stop judging others.

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